HUNGRY GERALD

There are some supermarket staples that are splendid, unchanging and need no improvements. They define what they are, beat back all challengers and laugh at innovation. They are so basic that we have the tendency to know just the substance and not the manufacturer. Some examples: Ketchup (Heinz); Mayonnaise (Hellmans); Tabasco (McIlhenny); English Muffins (Thomas); Worcestershire Sauce (Lea & Perrins). Sadly, much of what clutters supermarket aisles consists of “snacks”, sugary junk, sodas and “energy drinks” and should be flagged like cigarettes, with skull and cross bones warning: “Harmful To Your Health.” That said, there are a few items of negligible nutritional value that HG cannot resist: Keebler’s Club Crackers, Pepperidge Farm Thin Sliced White Bread, Uncle Ben’s Long Grain Rice. And, from the frozen foods case: Haagen Dasz (their salted caramel gelato and dulce de leche ice cream are really special). Bubbie’s very superior pickles were only found at Whole Foods but are now sneaking into some lower priced grocery stores. Sriracha from Huy Fong Foods is now omnipresent. Much applause from HG. No food remains bland while that hot chili sauce is at hand.

Campbell’s Tomato Soup. Velveeta Cheese. My-T-Fine Chocolate Pudding. Aunt Jemima Pancake Mix. Have not had any of these supermarket basics in scores and scores of years. While certainly not gourmet treats, they were important elements of HG’s schoolboy cuisine. Little HG’s elementary school, P.S. 86, was just three blocks from home so HG would go home and enjoy a Mom-prepared lunch every day. A bowl of tomato soup (HG’s Mom used milk rather than water in preparing this excellent potage). A Velveeta-lettuce-tomato-sliced onion sandwich on whole wheat or Pechter’s pumpernickel bread with a goodly dollop of Hellman’s Real Mayonnaise. And, sometimes, a chocolate pudding for dessert. For some obscure reason, Friday lunch was Aunt Jemima’s pancakes with butter and honey. This cuisine enabled smart little HG to get a consistent string of A’s on the HG report card. The Principal of P.S. 86 would bellow at his students during the weekly assembly: “Concentration. Self Control. Obedience. Watchwords for future success.” In later years, HG proved deficient in two of these watchwords but excelled in “Concentration” when applied to food and wine.

A Tramezzino is a modest in size, but rich in taste, little Italian sandwich with origins in the city of Turin. In Britain it would be referred to as a “tea sandwich” — those thin sandwiches served with afternoon tea. In Italy, these sandwiches scale creative heights. The bread is always thin white bread (crusts removed). If you want to make Tramezzini at home, try Pepperidge Farm Very Thin Sliced White. At bars in Venice, there are a variety of Tramezzini fillings. All start with lots of mayonnaise (home chefs make sure to use Hellman’s Real Mayonnaise). Here are some fillings: chopped egg; sliced egg with asparagus spears; arugula and bresaola (air cured beef); tuna and sliced onion; tuna and white beans; ham and provolone. When HG makes Tramezzini at home, he adds to this list rare roast beef with slices of cornichons; bacon and turkey; sardines and sliced onion; Piquillo peppers and anchovies; smoked salmon and capers (no mayonnaise on this one– just brush the bread with a bit of olive oil). Tips: Do not stint on the mayonnaise. Do not use tomatoes — you don’t want mushy bread. Use your imagination in terms of additions and garnishes and always slice the sandwich diagonally to create 2 attractive triangles. In Italy, Tramezzini are a favorite of teenagers, businessmen in a hurry and ladies who like them with a bracing cup of tea. If you enjoy Tramezzini you will be in good company. HG’s distinguished son-in-law, Profesore/Dottore Massimo and Guido Brunetti, the detective protagonist of Donna Leon’s Venetian novels, fancy these morsels. HG favors a tray of Tramezzin with chilled Prosecco while watching his NBA heroes performing their wonders on television. Nice way to spend a chilly Sunday afternoon.

One of HG’s favorite cookbooks is The Frankies Spuntino Kitchen Companion & Cooking Manual. SJ introduced HG and BSK to Frankies 457 Spuntino Restaurant on Smith Street in the Carroll Gardens neighborhood of Brooklyn. Wonderful, forthright Brooklyn/Italian food with an emphasis on lightness and natural flavors. Memorable salads. HG/BSK have used the Frankies recipe for romaine hearts with Caesar dressing with delicious results. It’s not a Caesar salad, just a tasty, simplified dressing that uses Hellmann’s Mayonnaise instead of raw eggs. No croutons. Good. HG despises them. HG shares the Frankies fondness for Hellmann’s. The cookbook notes that Nobu Matsushita, the great Japanese chef of Nobu fame, uses Hellmann’s in his signature shrimp and lobster dishes. Good enough for Nobu. Good enough for HG. Of course, if you are doing aioli or rouille, hand whipped, made from scratch mayo is essential. But, for sandwiches, cole slaw, potato salad and a multitude of other dishes Hellmann’s is the stuff. And, when it’s post-Thanksgiving and Christmas turkey sandwich time, haul out that other ornament of the supermarket — Heinz Ketchup. Mixed with Hellmann’s (and some optional, chopped sweet gherkins) the resulting Russian dressing makes even dry turkey breast very palatable.