HUNGRY GERALD

There are some supermarket staples that are splendid, unchanging and need no improvements. They define what they are, beat back all challengers and laugh at innovation. They are so basic that we have the tendency to know just the substance and not the manufacturer. Some examples: Ketchup (Heinz); Mayonnaise (Hellmans); Tabasco (McIlhenny); English Muffins (Thomas); Worcestershire Sauce (Lea & Perrins). Sadly, much of what clutters supermarket aisles consists of “snacks”, sugary junk, sodas and “energy drinks” and should be flagged like cigarettes, with skull and cross bones warning: “Harmful To Your Health.” That said, there are a few items of negligible nutritional value that HG cannot resist: Keebler’s Club Crackers, Pepperidge Farm Thin Sliced White Bread, Uncle Ben’s Long Grain Rice. And, from the frozen foods case: Haagen Dasz (their salted caramel gelato and dulce de leche ice cream are really special). Bubbie’s very superior pickles were only found at Whole Foods but are now sneaking into some lower priced grocery stores. Sriracha from Huy Fong Foods is now omnipresent. Much applause from HG. No food remains bland while that hot chili sauce is at hand.

The De Gustibus Report in The New York Times noted the growing popularity of the peanut butter and pickle sandwich. Many claim that this unlikely combination is superior to the traditional peanut butter and jelly sandwich, the staple of children’s lunchboxes. This is old hat for BSK. She grew up in Ohio munching on peanut butter, pickle, lettuce and mayo sandwiches. Now a purist, BSK insists upon Bubbie’s Bread and Butter Pickles as an ingredient in this sandwich. BSK manages to get down a lot of peanut butter. Spreads it on slices of apple and dips carrot spears in a jar of peanut butter. However, BSK does not indulge in an Elvis Presley favorite sandwich: bacon, sliced bananas and peanut butter. HG is not a big peanut butter fan. But, there is an exception. HG likes to mix peanut butter with dark soy sauce, vinegar, sesame oil, Szechuan preserved vegetables, pungent Chinese chile-garlic paste. Pours this over shredded cold chicken or room temperature linguine. Showers it with sliced and shredded scallions plus some crushed Szechuan peppercorns. Great summer dinner.

HG truly hates the whole world of mega fast food. Vile hamburgers. Nasty, oily fried chicken. Doesn’t taste good and it’s not good for you. A nice hamburger made at home is a whole other story. HG uses ground chuck with a reasonable fat content. No fat spells a dry and tasteless burger. HG adds a bit of micro-planed garlic to the meat and gently forms the patty. Overworking creates toughness. HG’s trusty, old and seasoned cast iron pan is put on high heat with a thin layer of kosher salt (meanwhile some sliced onions are cooking in another pan). When the cast iron is good and hot the patty goes on (there will be smoke and sizzle). A good crust develops. The burger is flipped so the other side gets crusty. Then the heat is turned to medium (you want a crusty, not burned burger). After a bit of time, HG sticks in a fork to test for doneness (HG likes a pink, but not raw burger…steak tartare it isn’t). HG finishes it with some blue cheese which melts quickly. This delicious piece of meat is slipped on a slice of ciabatta and smothered in the fried onions. A few Bubbie’s sweet pickle slices on the side (HG must have his vegetables). When ripe and in season, some sliced tomato is a good idea or in the dead of winter, you can try Kumato tomatoes which are flavorful and available at Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s year round. This is a good, down home meal and all it needs to round it out is some fruity California Zinfandel. A pox on you. Mickey Dee.