HUNGRY GERALD

HG, not exactly a champion class Nature Boy, usually finds gardens — no matter how famous, how praised — boring. The urban old fellow prefers peering into shop windows, examining the menus outside of restaurants and watching the passing parade of humanity from a comfortable cafe chair. VanDusen Botanical Garden in Vancouver upsets all of HG’s predilections. Beautifully maintained and imaginatively laid out, this wonderland has unusual plantings, lovely vistas and, of course, blazes of startling color. On its meadows and in odd corners are sculpture. Not sentimental crap but challenging and distinctive work. The only other gardens that HG ever enjoyed as much were the famous Zen gardens in Kyoto, Japan.

Lunched at Tatsu Japanese Bistro on Commercial Drive. The “Drive” has long been the center of “alternative lifestyles” in Vancouver. Its funkiness is being diminished a bit by some attractive new shops and restaurants but it still has cheap ethnic markets and colorful, eccentric local characters. Tatsu is a charming little place. Sushi, sashmi and all the other Japanese faves imaginatively presented and very modestly priced. HG had a sashimi bento box that had rolls, sushi, salads, slices of salmon and yellowtail plus an abundance of fruit. A huge amount of food that HG couldn’t finish. Cost: $14. A very tasty bargain.

HG at the Korean Pavillion At the VanDusen Gardens

The Hooters restaurant chain (locations throughout the world) provokes HG anger. Like a lecherous uncle, there is something downright perverse about the chain’s deliberate exploitation and objectification of the bodies of young women. (HG has never been in a “Hooters” but has watched the chain’s repulsive, leering videos). One of HG’s favorite food bloggers is David Lebovitz (“Living the Sweet Life in Paris.”) He is a graceful writer and an accomplished cook. Recently, Lebovitz attended a holiday party and through a silly gift exchange, he wound up with The Hooters Cookbook. Bemused (and amused), Lebovitz decided to test a recipe: Deep Fried Onion Rings. And, annoyingly, the onion rings turned out to be splendid. As a matter of moral principle (even though HG loves onion rings–even more than he loves French fries) HG will not try the recipe. Since HG will be summering with BSK and family on Prince Edward Island, HG will enjoy the world’s best deep fried onion rings at Rick’s Fish and Chips, the delightful restaurant near the edge of St.Peter’s Bay. Six oysters on the half shell, fresh fried haddock, onion rings, cole slaw and a cold bottle of locally brewed artisan ale—that’s what HG will be eating at Rick’s following a day of swimming, sunning and kayaking. Envious?

Good news. A health magazine recently reported that pork rinds are a (relatively) healthy food. Yes, plenty of fat in these bits of fried pork skins but its a good kind of fat and the skins contain plenty of beneficial oelic acid. Since HG likes to scatter some pork rinds over a bowl of green chili stew the happy report caused HG to muse over other (not so healthy) fried favorites. When HG used to visit the streets of the Washington Heights section of Manhattan (lots of Puerto Ricans, Dominicans and Cubans lived there) HG would often drop into one of the plain spoken restaurants for a favorite meal: Moros y Cristianos ( Moors and Christians–black beans and rice topped with chopped raw onions) and a bowl of Chicharrones (fried pork fat, a by product of lard production). When in a hurry, HG would buy a snack at a Cuchifrito. A Cuchifrito is a colorfully decorated rolling cart that sells freshly made fried foods. (“Cuchifrito” also refers to a whole range of fried pork dishes served in Puerto Rican restaurants). HG remembers with fondness the baccalitos (salt cod pancakes) and rellenos de papas (fried mashed potato balls stuffed with meat or cheese) dispensed by a little cart near St. Nicholas Avenue. However, when HG explores the fried food HG memory bank, the taste standout is old fashioned fried chicken skin (fried in chicken fat, of course) that HG’s Mom cooked while she was rendering schmaltz (chicken fat). A favorite HG childhood sandwich was two slices of Pechter’s Pumpernickel Bread enhanced with an abundance of chicken fat, fried onions and a load of fried chicken skin (gribenes.) Serve a youngster that dish today and it’s off to jail you’ll go for impairing the health of a minor. HG has learned that the Second Avenue Delicatessen in New York (the new one in the East 30’s–the revered old one on Second Avenue closed following a rent dispute) serves a free “amuse bouche” of gribenes. Must indulge on next New York visit.

HG likes fresh, seasonal raw vegetables. A healthy, festive way to dine with friends is to prepare a very big platter of crudites (as raw vegetables are described on Paris bistro menus.) Broccoli and cauliflower florets. Scallions. Slivers of fennel. Radishes. Slices of young turnip. Red pepper slices. Fava beans in a bowl, sprinkled with olive oil and shavings of pecorino cheese. Set the table with small bowls of good olive oil (fruity Sicilian, robust Greek, flavorful Californian). Maldon Sea Salt. A pepper grinder. Sourdough bread, toasted and rubbed with garlic. Bagna Cauda (olive oil, garlic, anchovy mixture lightly heated)…And, Dukkah. What is “Dukkah,” you may inquire? It is an Egyptian mixture of ground hazelnuts, sesame seeds, spices. A little bit hot. Very addictive. Have lots of red wine and some chilled white ready to pour. Let the feast begin. Dip. Crunch. (HG likes to dunk bread spears into olive oil and dip them in Dukkah. Ah !!). HG follows this with a simple dish of pasta (capellini) with anchovies and garlic (pour the remains of the Bagna cauda over it). Fresh fruit for dessert. Keep the laughter going with after feast grappa, brandy or sambuca.

There seems to be a prevalent belief among American professional chefs and home cooks that vegetables should be cooked al dente — just a shade softer than raw. The technique (fostered by the late Julia Child): Blanch vegetables in boiling water. Remove. Stop the cooking by rinsing in ice water. Saute briefly. Serve. HG disagrees. Like our neighbors in the Southern states, HG likes soft vegetables cooked into creamy goodness. (There is an exception. BSK cooks a very al dente broccoli di rabe with lots of garlic and red chili. It’s good. Would be better if she left it in the pan for another ten minutes). HG likes the well done haricot verts in Paris (and the glazed carrots served in bistros with some beef stews). Italians, who can be immoderate in politics, choose a middle way in cuisine. They don’t like things too hot or too cold. And they like–as is proper–vegetables cooked beyond the al dente stage. HG has very few cooked vegetable allies. But, an outstanding advocate of slow and long vegetable cooking is Lesley Porcelli (a woman of Italian lineage, of course). You can find an excellent article by her in the October 2011 issue of Saveur Magazine. Take a peek at her recipes: Slow-coked broccoli di rabe with crushed red chiles and garlic; olive oil braised mixed vegetables; Indian- style carrots with mustard seeds; braised celery and tomatoes; Lebanese-style green beans with chick peas in olive oil. All savory and full of lush flavors.

Many, many decades ago when HG was a young New York journalist, HG would join a raffish crowd of late night drinkers at Moe Dubiner’s bar/restaurant on Stanton Street (years before the Lower East Side became cool and trendy). The cuisine was Eastern European Jewish, relished alike by the Irish policemen and the Jewish mob guys and bail bondsmen who made the joint their hangout. HG’s nocturnal snack at Dubiner’s was a big plate of gefilte fish (for the unknowing–this is a type of robust quenelle of minced whitefish and carp poached in fish broth) accompanied by challah, rye bread, pickles and copious amounts of very strong horseradish. Four Roses rye whiskey and beer chasers. These tastes of yesteryear have, thankfully, been rediscovered. Kedem Gourmet Gefilte Fish from Israel (available at Whole Foods) is the real thing. As the label says: “No MSG. No egg yolk. No matzo meal.” The Kedem product has the right density and no sweetness. Its appropriate companion is Lou’s Famous Organic Horseradish. Most bottled horseradish is insipid and tasteless. Not Lou’s. This is powerful stuff with a real bite that must be used with a degree of caution. Clears the sinuses and makes HG feel young again.

Bob C., journalist, publisher, senatorial press secretary, horseman, befriender of burros and a fellow resident of northern New Mexico came to dinner bearing a bottle of Bushmills Irish Whiskey. BSK decided to honor the noble beverage by doing a belated Paddy Day feast. Corned beef. Potatoes. Cabbage. The ingredients got that special BSK twist. The corned beef got some good peppercorn spicing and simmered happily for about three hours. The cabbage was not boiled but stir fried in a manner derived from a James Beard recipe. The potatoes were smashed with chicken stock, olive oil and chopped green onions. The corned beef was accompanied by a parsley sauce that BSK sourced from the remarkable Colman Andrews. This was a puree of parsley, butter, milk, onions, broth from the cooked corned beef and a bit of flour for thickening. (You can find the recipe for the corned beef and the parsley sauce in The Brisket Book: A Love Story With Recipes by Stephanie Pierson, a wise and funny book by a wise and funny writer). HG provided the table with dill pickles, hot mustard, Guinness Stout and Belgian ale. Lots of laughs helped along by after dinner Bushmills indulgence. (If you enjoy penetrating writing and sharp wit, log into Bob C.’s Blog: An Old Gringo’s Gazette.

The 10-cent Nedick’s hot dog (Nedick’s, now shuttered, was a New York City based fast food chain predating Mickey Dee). The Sabrett’s hot water dog with its odd tomato and onion sauce. The Chicago hot dog replete with “sport” peppers, celery salt, pickles and other greenery. The Bronx kosher deli dog with hot mustard and sauerkraut. The estimable doggie sold in the Costco food court. All of these have provided HG with varying degrees of pleasure. But, HG’s favorite canine can only be found in the small state of Rhode Island. Yes, Rhody is of modest size but it specializes in big, highly idiosyncratic flavors. And, for sheer oddity (as well as a strange, hard-to-pin-down savoriness) the “New York System Hot Wiener” (accompanied by a cold Coffee Milk) stands out and makes HG bark with delight. Permit HG to do a scholarly exegesis on the proletarian pup: The wiener used in a NY System is either the skinless product, the Little Rhody or the Saugy which has a natural English sheep casing (giving it a characteristic snap). Alone, or in a roll, these small sized dogs are certainly good but nothing to write an HG posting about. But, then comes the sauce. Ah, the sauce. The French say cheese is milk’s leap into immortality (When the French get things right, they get them really right). And, the spicy meat sauce that smothers the Hot Wiener makes the tube steak leap into nosh immortality. Created by Greek immigrants in the early 1920s (or somewhere around there) the meat sauce is truly the flavor of the old world (Europe, Middle East) meeting (or meating!) the new. There are hints of Italian Ragu and Greek Mousaka. Bits of Texas chili. Smidgens of Middle Eastern kefta (possibly due to tiny infusions of cinnamon, cumin and possibly all spice). The faintest evocation of Portuguese stews. But, why try to analyze it. Like a kiss from a beautiful woman, just enjoy it and don’t intellectualize. One would think that the sauce could stand alone, No. Rhode Islanders further enhance the Hot Wiener with mustard, chopped onion and celery salt. So, what do you drink with his extravaganza? Just as HG believes the only appropriate drink to guzzle with a New York hot pastrami sandwich is the “Jewish Champagne” that is Dr. Brown’s Cel-Ray Tonic, Rhodys opt for Coffee Milk. This beverage is made with two tablespoons of locally made Autocrat Coffee Syrup mixed with icy milk. Stirred well. Simple. Perfect. HG believes the Rhode Island fondness for coffee milk is somehow linked to the Rhode Island fondness for coffee and donuts at Dunkin’ Donuts. Rhodys are the nation’s largest per capita consumers of donuts (the Providence sports and entertainment center is the Dunkin’ Donuts Arena known to all followers of Providence and Rhode Island University basketball teams as “the Dunk).

Given all of this yummy history, HG’s heart picked up a beat today when he opened a package from the Family R.: Gifted Daughter Lesley, Profesore/Dottore Massimo, Glorious Granddaughters Arianna and Sofia. The little bundle contained a package of Olneyville N.Y. System, R.I.’s Best Hot Wieners, Hot Wiener Sauce Spice Mix (since 1946) plus a bottle of Autocrat, enough to make many glasses of Coffee Milk “The Official State Drink of Rhode Island.” The enclosed card read: “A taste of Rhode Island for Hungry Gerald.” HG has a kind and thoughtful family. HG will sample these good RI things while listening to Blossom Dearie sing: “Rhode Island Is Famous For You.”

“Eat your vegetables!!” “Finish your brocoli — or no dessert!!” “Eat them — they’re good for you!!” Yes, as children, we were all subject to threats, pleadings and promises regarding vegetables. And, naturally, this has led to resistance. What didn’t come across was the fact that vegetables, if treated properly, are very tasty and worthy companions to good red wine. Witness the roasted vegetable platter prepared this week by life companion BSK. Neither a doctrinaire vegetarian nor a rigid health nut, BSK nonetheless glories in vegetables and treats them imaginatively and with dignity. For the vegetable dinner, BSK filled a baking pan with cauliflower florets, slices of red pepper, radishes,fennel slices, chick peas, chunks of turnip and carrot, Brussel sprouts. This colorful melange got a nice dousing of garlic infused olive oil plus a sprinkling of ground pepper, kosher salt and Goya Adobo. For crunch, BSK topped the vegetables with some finely chopped pancetta (a bow to HG’s infatuation with Italian piggy products). Into a 375 degree oven. Roasted into levels of crisp and unctuous. BSK also cooked some quinoa with onions and mushrooms in chicken stock. This was the centerpiece of the vegetable extravaganza. A companion was a very big bowl of Greek yogurt enriched with oil, garlic, Tsatziki spices, some preserved lemon and piquant Spanish smoked paprika. Adding a Middle Eastern touch was a small dish of harissa. Delicious. Some worthy folks like George Bernard Shaw and I.B. Singer were dedicated vegetarians. HG doubts they ever tasted anything as good as BSK’s creation even with the pancetta and chicken broth eliminated.

In a recent New York Times piece, chef/restaurateur Mario Batali noted that a favorite dish is “Spicy vermicelli with anchovies, hot pepper and bread crumbs.” BSK made a variation of this dish last night. BSK got rid of the bread crumbs and added garlic plus flash-fried squid. Substituted capellini (“angel hair”) fot the thicker vermicelli. BSK and HG like this skinny pasta and (slightly thicker) fedelini. Be forewarned, this pasta cooks in a flash. If serving at room temperature, douse the cooked pasta with cold water and drain thoroughly to stop it from over-cooking.

Room temperature or chilled vermicelli is a standard accompaniment to many Asian dishes. BSK often serves it (with a shot of sesame oil and a dab of sambal oelek or a squirt of sriracha) with Mapo Tofu or alongside sauteed bok choy and steamed mustard greens. BSK also makes Taiwanese Oyster Soup (google the recipe) with gently poached oysters, vermicelli, stock, rice wine, soy sauce, etc. Chinese noodle soup with a skinny twist.