HUNGRY GERALD

HG has never enjoyed pricey, upscale, high cuisine restaurants. In many decades of dining, only four have given HG pleasure commensurate with the expenditure. One, Le Pavillon, in New York is long gone, but memories of their fillets of smoked eel topped with a horseradish-infused whipped cream will linger on the HG palate forever. Another, the Connaught Hotel Restaurant in London offered the quintessential civilized English dining experience — perfect Dover Sole (de-boned at the table), Stilton and Port to finish (with a cigar service for those who indulged – and HG did just that). Alas, the Connaught has changed so much that it is unrecognizable. Two, both in New York, are alive and well. One is Le Bernardin and the other is the Four Seasons Restaurant in the Seagram Building. Le Bernardin is flawless, simply the best seafood in the world prepared with flair and imagination. Fabulous wine list supervised by a renowned sommelier. Very, very expensive but not insane. Lunch Prix Fixe is $72 (three courses) and Dinner Prix Fixe is $127 (four courses). Tasting menu is more extravagant — $237 with paired wines. HG was a frequent diner at the Four Seasons during HG’s New York career. The Pool Room is the most beautiful restaurant space in the world. Curiously, New York big shots never ate there. They chose the more austere Grill Room. Menu is the same in both rooms. The Four Seasons used to be expensive but affordable for tax deductible meals. Now, the prices have gone through the roof. An appetizer of Spaghetti with Poached Egg and Black Truffles is $75. Grilled shrimp appetizer is $38. Venison, lamb chops, bison and steak are about $75. If you want to sample Four Seasons cuisine without going broke, take a seat at the bar. The Bar Menu is delicious and affordable (comparatively).

“Comfort” in terms of restaurants is hard to define. There are plenty of neighborhood diners and the like serving up comfort food from meatloaf to frito pie, but for HG, a “comfort” restaurant has to have longevity (restaurant has been around a long time); old fashioned decor; professional waitpersons with long years of service; an unchanging menu. “Comfort” means a democratic approach. No special deference to big shots. No “Siberia.” Gage & Tollner (long closed) in Brooklyn met HG’s “comfort” criteria. So did the two (now closed) “dairy” restaurants on the Lower East Side — Ratner’s and Rappoport’s. As far as places that are still in existence, HG has three favorites. In Boston, it’s Durgin-Park. Very touristy and very plain spoken. HG likes to start with clams on the half shell. Then, a giant slab of rare roast beef (or chicken pot pie or grilled knockwurst with Boston baked beans). For dessert, New England Indian Pudding, natch. In Chicago, nothing beats Gene & Georgetti for old time Windy City flavor. Sirloin steak with a “Garbage” salad and fried onion rings. In San Francisco, Tadich Grill does the best Pacific seafood. HG has one or two Sloe Gin Fizzes at the bar. When seated at table, HG dives into a Dungeness crab cocktail, sauteed Petrale sole or the vast Cioppino, the incomparable seafood stew. A true New York “comfort” restaurant is Keen’s Chop House, home of the famed (giant) mutton chop. However, the prices at Keen’s continue to move upward so the eatery is barely in the “comfort” zone and has instead moved into masochist territory. With the guidance of SJ, HG is comforted at affordable Chinese restaurants in Manhattan, Flushing and the Sunset Park neighborhood of Brooklyn.

But wait…There’s a fourth. And, it truly defines the word “comfort.” Located in Italy, of course. HG refers to Bologna’s wondrous Ristorante Diana. A very old restaurant with a beautiful mirrored interior. Gentle lighting. Helpful (never obsequious) service. HG starts his meals there with a glass of Prosecco while contemplating the delights which will ensue. A bottle of Emilia Romagna’s red Sangiovese is uncorked. Then, a plate of tagliatelle dressed simply with butter and the best Parmigiano Reggiano. Using an instrument designed for the purpose, the waiter showers the pasta with shavings of white truffle. The heady fragrance fills the air and occupants of neighboring tables nod in approval. This is followed (and it is not an anti-climax) by Bollito Misto. For those unfamiliar, this refers to a variety of boiled and poached meats. At Diana, the Bollito Misto is served from a large trolley wheeled by a very large man. On the trolley are two poached sausages, Cotechino and Zampone, plus boiled beef, pork and tongue — all juicy and flavorful. This is accompanied by salsa verde and a pungent mostarda di frutta. Dessert is Semifreddo followed by a number of snifters of grappa (for digestive purposes). A brief stroll and a long nap is obligatory. True Comfort.

HG and BSK had great fun spending part of each year year in a Vancouver loft (and then an ultra-modernist glass town house). A city of great architecture, mind boggling scenery, ethnic and cultural diversity. Posh skyscrapers and waterfront mansions; a nude beach; one section of town dominated by junkies and another (Commercial Drive) where the Sixties live forever. Much superior weed cultivated and smoked. Downsides: Rain. Homeless scavengers. Violent Indo/Canadian and Chinese drug gangs. Ridiculously high wine and spirits prices (because of taxes). For HG, the biggest plus was the food. The Public Market on Granville Island (and neighboring Island shops) is Foodie-Died-And-Gone-To-Heaven. There is such a large Asian population in Vancouver that locals refer to it as “Van Kong.” The neighboring city of Richmond is so Asian that New Yorkers may think of it as a vast Flushing. Obviously, this means there is a plenitude of Chinese restaurants. And, folks in Vancouver take Chinese dining seriously. So, while HG and BSK love their Southwestern life, they are pained when they read an article like the recent Vancouver Sun survey of its readership’s favorite Chinese dining experiences. Some 32,273 diners responded with glowing testimonials to such delicious treats as salt and pepper pork loin; Shanghainese pan fried buns; Taiwanese beef noodles; steamed Dungeness crabs; Stir fried prawns with eggs. Restaurants HG will try on next Vancouver visit: Fatty Cow Seafood (for hot pot); Sha Lin Noodle House (for noodles..what else?); Fisherman’s Terrace Seafood for dim sum; Hong Kong Barbecue Shop (for duck and pork). HG will not neglect his traditional favorites: Kirin. Congee Noodle House and Congee Noodle King. Chongquing Szechuan, Sun Sui Wah. Plus — Rodney’s for oysters and Vij’s for incomparable Indian fusion food.

HG spent a week this last December wandering around the Lower East Side, Little Italy, Chinatown and parts of Soho. The LES is becoming more than cool. It’s frigid. Good little art galleries showing challenging work. Excellent restaurants and bars. It’s a venue for the hip and the beautiful. The old parts of Chinatown (the borders of Chinatown have expanded so massively into the LES and Little Italy that HG needs to define which parts of Chinatown HG is talking about) look a bit sad. Swathes of Mott Street have been taken over by stalls selling the worst kind of crap to tourists. Yes, it’s still a food obsessed community awash with fresh fish and vegetables (absurdly low prices). And, street life is lively. But, the neighborhood seems to lack some of the elan and zest of yesteryear (It may that HG is looking at it with the nostalgia clouded gaze of an old guy). Little Italy has been shrunken, vulgarized and totally touristified. Pity. Reports about old ethnic restaurants like Vincent’s, Umberto’s and Grotto Azzura are not promising. HG has been a great fan of the fiery scungili, shrimp and clam dishes that were once available in Little Italy. Now, if you desire food a la Diavalo, you’ve got to travel to Sheepshead Bay or Howard Beach. Foodies claim that Chinatown cuisine has gone downhill and if you want superior Chinese cooking the Flushing neighborhood of Queens is the place. Yes, there’s great food in Flushing. But, HG ate some superior Chinatown food while visiting at Peking Duck House, Dim Sum Go Go and Full House Cafe. It is still the New York neighborhood where the impecunious can dine for very few bucks. One of the hot items in Chinatown is peeled noodles. Basically, hand pulled noodles but cut into wide strips with a knife. HG had a big plate of these noodles with a super spicy lamb sauce at Xi’an Famous Foods (on Bayard west of Bowery). Fabulous. Cost six bucks. HG had a very good dish of peeled noodles with baby bok choy at Sheng Wang (on Eldridge). Cost five bucks. One night, HG and BSK were feeling peckish before settling down to watch some silly stuff on TV. HG walked down the block to J.J. Noodles (Catherine and Henry) and came back with two big containers of congee with fresh fish filets. Perfect comfort food. Cost eight bucks. Yeah, you can still get nourished in Chinatown.

Cuisine from the Italian region of Puglia isn’t well known in this country. Emilia-Romagana, the Veneto (especially Venice); Piedmont, Sicily are familiar to many Americans. Puglia remains obscure. HG loves Orechiette (“little ears”), a favored pasta shape in Puglia. BSK likes to smother these cute morsels with BSK’s broccoli sauce (good olive oil, anchovies, lots of garlic and hot pepper flakes; broccoli florets). BSK varies it by using broccoli di rabe and hot Italian sausage. Good stuff. Over the years a few Pugliese restaurants have opened (and closed) to great fanfare but there is one Pugliese restaurant that remains in New York — the imaginatively named Puglia in Little Italy. Been there since 1919. HG used to eat there many years ago. Loved the restaurant’s version of pasta e fagioli. HG was a bit timid in those days and shunned Puglia’s authentic tripe dishes and sheep’s head (kind of a peasant version of French tete de veau). HG checked Puglia’s current menu. These dishes do not appear. Menu (sadly) is like most of the others in Little Italy. Dumbed down food for tourists.

While visiting daughter Lesley R. and family over the holidays, HG dined at Los Andes, a Peruvian restaurant in South Providence. Great fun. Big (huge would be a better adjective) portions. Two types of ceviche (best in HG’s memory) of calamari,tilapia, mussels, shrimp, clams and scallops. Mixed grill of steak, chorizo and chicken. Pork ribs confit. Sides of grilled plantains, yucca, sweet potatoes, rice baked with cheese. There were also whipped potatoes in a unique Peruvian sauce (plus pureed avocados). Mussels topped with chopped tomatoes and onions. Pisco sours, Sangria. Chilean red wine. Flan for dessert. A nice introduction to the season of holiday feasting.

During HG’s lengthy residence in Colorado (and now Santa Fe) there was one thing missing from HG’s idyllic life. A great Chinese restaurant. So, ironically, as soon as HG left Denver a great Chinese restaurant opened in the Mile High City. The restaurant is Star Kitchen (Mississippi and Federal Boulevard). Big, nicely lit room. Swift service. Exquisite Cantonese food — Steamed chicken dumplings, Fried pork dumplings. Big, juicy deep fried shrimps balls. All fresh and flavorful. Then came a platter of sauteed greens with garlic. An extraordinary dish of Japanese eggplant in a robust sauce redolent of garlic and ginger. Shredded pork with Chinese mushrooms and bok choy. Sesame chicken (crisp and not too sweet). HG and BSK were with friends with conservative eating habits so the restaurant’s renowned seafood dishes were untried. That will be remedied next time. Star Kitchen is reputed to have the best dim sum in the great land mass between California and Chicago. Those little yummies will also have to wait until our next visit.

HG could not leave Rhode Island without lunching on a native treat: A New York System Hot Wiener. So, accompanied by gifted Daughter Lesley R., off to the friendly, down home, plain spoken Riverside Grill in the town of Riverside. Had two wieners (they are composed of pork and beef and gently steamed). The tube steaks are served in soft buns and topped with mustard, celery salt, chopped raw onions and meat sauce (flavored with cumin and cinnamon). Curiously, these wieners evoke flavors of the Iberian Peninsula and the Middle East which is perhaps a reflection of the Greek roots of many Rhode Island hot dog shops. The only comparable fast food dish that hits the taste buds in the same way is the chile served in Cincinnati eateries. At the Riverside Grill, the wieners are accompanied by a Rhode Island beverage, coffee milk. This is cold milk flavored with coffee syrup. Somehow it all works.

HG’s pal, Bill Schuck, sent him a copy of The Deli Man, a clip from a longer film. Nice nostalgic stuff about Jewish delis with cameos from Larry King, Alan Dershowitz and other pastrami fanatics. Shocking fact. There were once 1,550 Jewish delis in the five boroughs of New York. There are now only 150 in all of North America; that said many staples of the Jewish Deli (pastrami, chopped liver, etc.) have become part of the mainstream eating culture of the United States. According to informed opinion, the best Jewish deli in the United States is Langer’s, located in a gritty Los Angeles neighborhood. The proprietor of Langer’s is gloomy about the future of the deli. Jewish kids prefer hamburgers. Sad. They will never know the glory of a heartburn produced by a bowl of matzo ball soup followed by an overstuffed pastrami sandwich.

Some years ago HG and BSK were strolling in the colorful, noisy, fragrant Italian city of Naples, a place where anarchy (and crime) reigns. It was midday and a group of men gathered before the ground floor of a ramshackle apartment house. A window opened and a woman handed out bowls of something that looked quite robust (HG thinks it was Trippa Napoletana — tripe done in the Neapolitan style). The lady sold a lot of food. HG doubts whether she was troubled by health inspectors or tax collectors. The scene reminded HG of the illegal restaurants that used to flourish in the basements of buildings in New York’s Garment Center and Fur District. These places opened at noon and closed at two. The scene was mayhem. Workers in the Fur District were Greeks and Jews. The cuisine reflected this. HG remembers tasty Moussaka, lemony chicken stews, goulash. kasha varnishkes with mushrooms, onions and chicken livers. Hearty stuff for hardworking folks untroubled by indelicate presentation.